Sunday, September 4, 2011

Submission is Easy

A year or so ago I met a dominant woman that transformed my life.  I met her on Collarme and we conversed for a few weeks sending each other many notes in that short period of time.  What she taught me was that submission wasn't about me 'getting' but about me 'giving'. Furthermore she told me that I would experience satisfaction in giving even if it seemed like a foreign concept at the time- which it did.  How right she was.  Since that time I have become quite a content sub to the woman I love - Katie.  Helping me solidify those thoughts was the book Uniquely Rika which I highly recommend to those that are new to this lifestyle or considering it.  It reinforced the concepts and thinking of the domme with whom I conversed.

Last week I began to converse with another submissive that is considering this way of life.  We've not spoken much via email but I have been thinking about what to tell him since I know he feels that what Rika speaks about is 'too difficult'.  All I know about him as a submissive is that he has been with a pro-domme but never pledged himself to a woman to serve on a continual basis.

Living as a single guy one shops, feeds, launders, cleans, maintains, budgets, and does all of those things necessary to sustain oneself. Now that I am Katie's sub I do all of those same things.  I do all of the same 'chores' that I did when not with her.  So the question that keeps haunting me is "why is submission so hard?"  I mean, is it that much harder to cook a meal for two than for one?  Is making a bed that two sleep in harder than making it for one?  Is cleaning, laundering, vacuuming, etc really any harder or more time consuming when with someone than when alone?  I think not.  So what's the difference?

The difference is that I don't necessarily choose when I will do my chores. The difference is that I am often told what to prepare or what to clean rather than making that decision myself.  The difference too is that I get to please a woman who is thankful for the deads I do.  The difference is that I get to massage a woman's body and communicate with her intimately.  The difference is that my mind isn't now focused on me and what I want but on what would make her smile, what would make her happy, what would please her.  The positives are without end and the effort is not that much greater.  The difference is now that I am more selfless and less selfish. The benefit is that I am learning what real love is all about. The benefit is that I am learning how to give rather than receive and as parents will tell you at Christmas time - the joy they receive when they see a child open a gift they are truly pleased with is well worth the expence and effort just to see that smile or feel that hug of gratitude.

I hope I can convey these thoughts accurately and effectively to my newly discovered submissive friend. I hope too that he decides to venture into the unknown and decide to serve a loving Domme that can nurture and develop his submissive tendencies. I can only hope to spread the good news that a man's place is at the foot of a woman, ready and waiting to please her and hear her say 'well done'.

1 comment:

  1. I think the question you have to answer is not "how is being a lifestyle sub better than being single?" but "how is being a lifestyle sub better than being in a regular vanilla relationship?"

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