Tuesday, October 18, 2011
She's coming back!
I wrote in a recent post expressing ways in which Katie had 'lost her dominance' by not having me do those usual things I normally do for her. Enslave meh commented "just wait a few day my friend and you will be in for a very good suprise. that is what happens with me. after every lull the awakening of dominance is so strong that i just love it."
How true his comment was as she indeed has once again become that controlling woman I love so much. How lucky I am to have a woman that loves me, enjoys me, yet controlls me. At times she lets my leash out quite a bit - too far from my perspective - yet she can reel me back so quickly. It's not a game that she plays. Rather it is one in which she uses me - my body, my energy, my submission - to the degree that she needs me with regard to her own needs, wants and desires.
If you've been reading this blog, you know that Katie and I live some distance from one another - like 100 miles apart. I see her each weekend and often will drive down for the evening after work. Last night she told me she I was to come to her. It was the first time that she informed me that I was to come. Usually she asks if I am free; if I am tired; if I want to make the drive, etc. Yesterday I wasn't given a choice. Yesterday I was told to come after work. I loved it. Loved knowing that the drive was not a choice but a requirement. Hopefully she will tell me again, and not leave the choice to my whim or desire. She showed her dominance and I enjoyed the drive knowing that I would be able to care for her once I had arrived.
Sexually she asserted her self a few nights ago when she mounted me and enjoyed my body - using it to pleasure herself. Her positioning created so much sensation that I was unable to last very long. I told her I needed her to stop but she continued to ride me until I orgasmed. Immediately the thought came to mind, "please don't do this." It was a thought in reference to her mounting my face and having me consume as well as pleasure her orally. I didn't want her to move. I didn't want to taste myself. I just wanted her to lay on me and let me hold her. But that didn't happen. Instead she moved headward and I instinctively moved under her. Once she initiated her move, my instincts followed. I didnt' resist but rather submitted to what she wanted. When we make love from this position, this has become our ritual and it is becoming our ritual more and more regardless of what position we are in when I orgasm. It is one that reinforces the fact that I am her sub; one that confirms that she is indeed the dominant partner. One that reinforces the fact that there is a price to pay for the privilege to orgasm. And to be honest, as much as I detested the thought initially, I loved pleasing her once she was in position. I love pleasing her orally, enjoying the sounds and movement and feeling her passion as she climaxed several more times. In hindsight, I can't wait for the opportunity to please her yet again in this way.
Last evening she once again mounted me. I asked what the rule was for the evening and was informed that I was not to orgasm. We made love again with her on top. As like the time before, I do most of the work of moving. She expects me to be the active one while she enjoys the feelings of me moving within her. We shared intimately, being so close in so many ways. It was a wonderful time of sharing; one in which I lasted the entire time; one in which she brought me so close several times and then enjoyed keeping me on the edge for many minutes. I know that Katie loves knowing I am on the verge of an orgasm yet unable to climax. I know she loves being that woman that pleases me to this degree. I too love that feeling of being 'right there'. I wish that feeling would never end. It's the love/hate feeling of the sub with regard or being controlled sexually. It's a feeling that lasts so much longer than reaching a peak quickly and suddenly releasing all of that sexual tension. Denying me keeps me just a on the verge of going too far yet leaves me wanting her so badly. She allowed me to please her by penetration, orally and then again by penetrating her. She allowed my passion to be expressed. She allowed me to be the aggressor - allowing me to pursue and enjoy her. Yet she controlled the scene entirely. She initiated the sex. She laid out the rules with respect to my orgasming. She allowed me to please her orally but only after I first asked permission. She allowed me to penetrate her again but again only after asking permission and only for as long as she wanted me and, all the while knowing that I could not orgasm regardless of how long she allowed us to be one.
How sweet it is to have her back as my Domme, and now back demonstrating just yet one more area of contol that she's never done previously. I wonder if she will again or if this was just an aberation. Time will tell. Until then I will sit tight and wait for her order and relish in the thoughts of two wonderful evenings together.