"So I can't take it off tonight to let 'him' stretch?
"Do you have any idea when you will be letting me cum again?"
"So it could be as long as this summer?" I asked, seriously doubting she'd leave me shackled that long.
"Yes" she responded, much to my dismay.
"A year? I asked, now in a bit more panic.
"Maybe not till our honeymoon"
I looked at that text dumbfounded. We had talked about getting married at the end of the year or early into the following and I had no idea that she'd want me to go without an orgasm for that long.
"Are you serious?"
No response for five minutes so I asked her again, "Are you serious?" Still no response so I repeated the question. Finally she replied, "On phone with friend".
I couldn't believe she'd ignore me so I asked once more, "Are you serious?"
"Yes" Those dreaded three letters was all she wrote.
Then a moment later came another beep on my cell. I opened the text to read: "Aww, time flies" came her terse response. Was she serious, sympathetic or sarcastic. I couldn't tell.
"No more questions" came another text. I didn't text till I called her that evening.
Later on the phone she asked if I was upset with her. I told her I wasn't but was pouting a bit trying to wrap my brain about the possibility of being left that long without a release. Katie informed me it was only a possibility but one she is considering if leaving me in denial keeps me feeling especially close to her. She reminded me of my own words after she let me orgasm a little over a month ago, when I told her that I didn't feel as close and wanting to be near her, touching her, and desiring to care for her as much as I had for the week after she allowed me to orgasm. I reluctantly agreed that I did indeed feel that way and that there is this dichotomy in feelings now that I am being denied; part of me wants her to continue to deny me, but another wants to experience that feeling of climax even though I know there will be a dramatic reduction of passionate feelings after that momentary crest is breeched.
But a year? I couldn't help but think of the subtitle of the Male Chastity Blog "be careful what you wish for." How appropriate those words are now that she has gained a comfort level in my denial and the one-sided pleasure our relationship as taken a turn toward in the past several months.
I am starting day 32 as I write. I may be just 10% along the way till she allows me to experience the very thing I begged her to withhold just a few months previous. Never in my life did I think she'd enjoy the effects of my denial so much. Be careful men what you wish for. Your wife may just give it to you - and so much more than you ever dreamed.
What's the take home message? Never doubt a woman to do that which you never, ever dreamed she had the strength to do. Well, it's bedtime and I will wake up to start day 33, a day in which I will ache to serve her just as I longed to do on day 32.
Till next time,
Post script: I sent a draft of this post in an email this morning to be approved by Katie as I always do. I've had a day to ponder the texts of yesterday. My mind is peaceful. I realize that I don't have, nor do I want the power to decide. I want to serve her. I want to trust her. I realize as I stepped back from the emotion of the possibility of not cumming for a year that her decision is based on keeping us close as a couple and keeping me especially close to her as the man she loves and enjoys. I respect that. I respect her. I have come to see that her ways are best. She has always been a woman who makes wise decisions and does not rush into them as I would. So if it's a year, then it's a year. And if it is, it will be the best year of my life and one that I will learn much about myself and about her. I can't wait to see her on Friday.