Saturday, October 12, 2013

Enjoying our Roles

Last weekend Katie and I had a great day together. We slept in. We made love. She locked me after we rose, we spent an afternoon at the county fair. We did a bit of shopping. We shared a fun meal together. At the end of our day I found a favorite childhood movie online that we streamed on TV while I sat on the floor and massaged her feet and legs for a good hour or so.

The emotion of that day has diminished but the memories of it, to some degree, still remain.  It was a day of Katie getting to do what she wanted - some of which was mundane like picking up a few groceries - and the rest, just an ordinary day for us where she determined how we would spend it together. She decided when we were getting up, what time we left for the fair, where we walked, what things there she wanted to see, what we ate, when we left, if we were heading home or going somewhere else. She drove. She chose our destinations. She bought what she wanted when we shopped and ate out.

We spent our day together but she lived it as if she were alone even though I was with her the entire time.  She knew she didn't have to worry about me telling her to do things or go places that she didn't wish to go. I don't tell. I do make suggestions or remind her when she's told me "make sure I don't forget to do this while we are out", but I don't argue or disagree with her choices. It wasn't that she didn't want my input and it wasn't like she didn't go to see some things at the fair that were more my interest than hers, but we both knew that she was the one that would make the decisions of the day.

That evening as the movie started to play, I slid off the sofa and onto the ground taking off her shoes. I sat between her legs with hers draped over either shoulder and spent time massaging at first one foot and leg and then the other. Katie slipped out of her jeans and sat back, letting me massage and lightly touch her entire leg. Yet our focus was centered on the movie. We chatted. We didn't get kinky. We didn't even think about her being my dominant wife or me being her submissive husband.  We just enjoyed time together as a couple that love one another. She loves touch and I love caring for her in this way. We ended that evening heading up to bed with both of us having our emotional 'tanks' filled.  She got to be served. I had the privilege to serve.

I wouldn't wish for a life any different than what I have now.  She's beautiful both inside and out and fills me completely.

I'm Hers

Oh, and just before we fell asleep I asked, "How serious do you take your ownership of me?"

"Very"

Who wouldn't sleep soundly after hearing that?!  Life is good

15 comments:

  1. Yes, like women men want to know that they are loved. They also want to know they are owned.


    Love, Kathy

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    1. I a m one such man. I love to hear those words or ones similar to it. I'm sure you can identify similar feelings with your John

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  2. John wants to know that he is owned. He loves to wear my collar. He loves to hear those words, 'you are my slave". What I like to have him do is repeat those words back to me.'Whose slave are you', I will ask him. The correct answer from John is 'I am your slave, mistress".
    Than I will order him to repeat that phrasae. Then I will often ask John another question, 'whom do you obey'? He will anwer and again I will have him repeat. Then I will snap my fingers to put him in Command Position. John loves to be brought to his knees with a snap of my fingers, and yes, I like watching him perform for me. It makes me realize that I really do own this man. As a couple we have both become comfortable with our respective roles. John is proud to be owned, and I am just as proud to be his owner.

    Kathy

    Kaathy

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    1. The rituals or stating and him repeating sound delicious indeed. I love it when I am told 'you are all mine'. How interesting it is that we want to 'feel' the power a wife has over a submissive husband. It makes no sense but then, it makes complete sense as it reaffirms who we are (both dominant and submissive)

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  3. Great story... My wife and I were just talking last night about the role reversal in our marriage and how much we love our new relationship. Her leadership and has made me a better husband, dad and all around better person than I was prior to a FLR.I feel more marriages need to explore the openness and the expanded boundaries that a FLR brings to a marriage. It sure has worked for ours . R R

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    1. RR, I think word is getting out about FLR/WLM. I don't think what you and I have is for everyone. I read of a woman that loves being disciplined by her husband and loves it. To each is own, but for many men that have the tendencies of submission that we have, living under the rule of a wife that takes control is the best.

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  4. I loved reading this. If I can only FEEL owned, and FEEL my submission, it works for me. Though it's even better when she makes a point of it. I'd love it if she did something like Kathy does. I bet she will someday.

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    1. That is a nice thought Antwerp. I don't know if it will happen but it is indeed possible. The things that were once hard to talk about are no longer. Maybe she will be more verbal with her dominance. I would love that!

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  5. Hi IH,

    I have many such times with my own wife, where our respective roles are "understood" but I think I need to have my position as her slave and hers as my owner spelled out in concrete terms more often than you do.

    In its most extreme form, a D/s relationship could be where the woman is overtly dominating her husband every waking moment, by beating him, ordering him, controlling him etc. On the other hand, it could become so benign that the "submissive husband" is simply a doting husband who likes making his wife happy.

    If the latter example was enough for me, I would have been content to live my life as a stealth submissive to my wife. I need more than that, and don't find it hypocritical at all in declaring that submissive men have a right to have their needs met.

    It's not enough for me to "give". I need to "be taken". This is so easily accomplished, and with such a minimal amount of effort on the woman's part, that it's a shame that there are men like "Antwerp" (who commented above me), that have to go without.

    Best,

    Jake

    P.S. Not for nothin, and I do realize that given the longevity and tradition of this blog that you might not want to change things, but I really do feel that adopting a pen name for this blog other than "I'm Hers" would make it more personal. Just my opinion.

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    1. I don't want to be a passive doting 'do it all' husband either. I need to feel owned. I need to hear her tell me or make me. She doesn't do it overtly the way some dominant women do but for now it is enough.

      I'll give some thought to the pen name.

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  6. Since we are on the subject of roles in marriage I thought I would tell a story that I found amusing that my wife told me the other night. She was married years ago and for obvious reasons it did not work out. But she said soon after they were married he told her that he was the head of the household and what he said goes. She quickly replied "Sure as long as you ask me first" Needless to say the marriage did not last. She knew about FLR long before I ever did. It's working great for us. R R

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    1. RR was she really aware of FLR or was she a woman that preferred to lead without the knowledge of this being a way of life for many? Great story!

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    2. As an aside, Katie told me early on after we first met "you know, I always get what I want". I think it was her way of telling me that she was going to be the one in charge of the two of us. It took my dull brain awhile to see that but eventually I did.

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    3. I think my wife and Katie have a lot in common. My wife asked me out for our first date and the rest is history. When she wants something she does what she needs to get it.She has always shown leadership skills in her work and and now with FLR is able to use it in our marriage. I started reading about FLR about 3 years ago and approached her with the idea and now over 2 years later it is a way of life that we would never change.We both agree it's a wonderful way to live. RR

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  7. Mr IH,

    Your account is well written. Thank you for sharing.

    There seems to be many such accounts as of late. I have had several comments on my blog about men who are expressing how a WLM dynamic has reintroduced a loving bond between them and their partner where there was only the grim prospect of an eminent divorce on the horizon.

    Sincerely,

    -SH

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