Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Why Enjoy Submission

Katie and I ran our usual weekend shopping route picking up groceries, home improvement items and a few other miscellaneous purchases.  When we returned she dropped me off at the street to get the mail while she drove the car up and parked it near the house.  She of course went inside and left me to carry in the several bags and a few boxes of goods while she did whatever a woman does when they get home. As I was putting things away I reflected on how I was feeling – really good.  I was enjoying doing the work of clearing the purchased clutter from the counter, helping her remount a string of Christmas lights to a length of greenery because the old lights had stopped working. I also tended to the wash since it is the weekend.  I subconsciously asked myself, “Why are you enjoying this?”

I think I have AN answer. I don’t know if it is THE answer but for me I believe it is an answer.  My mind went to the title of a book that I never read but remember hearing something about years ago.  I believe it was called The Purpose Driven Life.  I don’t know why but that title popped into my mind and that, I felt was the answer to the question I had asked.  Purpose.  People need a purpose in life and men especially need a purpose.  Women are more relational. Men are more ‘doing’ and ‘thing’ oriented. Women tend to think more globally, conceptually, big picture. Men are more practical, problem solvers, doers.  (Those are generalities of course).

But what came to me was that in doing all this stuff, you know, that ‘stuff’ a writer from a few posts told me ‘this sucks’ stuff, is that in doing this ‘stuff’ I have a purpose.  My purpose is caring for my wife. I opened the car door for her each time we returned to it.  I kept her dry on a rainy Saturday while we shopped making sure the umbrella was open and over her when she got out of the car and while we walked in the rain. I pushed the shopping carts inside. I took bags and items from her hands, offering to carry them for her, I got the mail, I unloaded the car, I put all that stuff away. I did the wash. I did the dishes. And now I’m writing about all that stuff I did.  I have a purpose.  All of those tasks except for taking a moment to write this post had to do with easing her burden. It all had to do with letting her know that I was thinking of her by being considerate and helpful.  I didn’t just run an errand for myself.  I did it with her and for her.  I supported her. When she asked about this or that we talked but the reason we talked, or the reason that I shared thoughts, was because she wanted to know my opinion on an item that she had an interest.  Purpose.

I’m Hers

PS. Last evening we went to a party. Soon after arriving a single woman asked me to help her set time food items out before the crowd of people arrived. When she asked for my assistance I responded with a phrase that has become so natural to say I don’t even think about it anymore, “I’ll do whatever you want me to do,” I responded. Katie happened to step into our conversation at that moment.  The woman turned to me and then to Katie and commented seemingly quite surprised to hear those words, “I’m looking for a man that is willing to say those words.” Her tone was one of excitement as if to say, "wow, he really meant that."

What I find so interesting is how many women want a man to be at their call, their beckon.  So many men would love to have their men submit to them and just give them the power to decide and be trusted to lead as they wish, knowing they have a man next to them that loves them more than anything else. A man willing to do anything that needs done.


  1. What a fantastic entry! Good boy! I'm off to add your blog to my links page. Thank you for sharing this intimate side of you! :)

  2. Ladynmonkey,
    I always love welcoming new folk that take the time to post and especially if they are women. I went to your page to learn that you are a dominant woman. Now that is both commendable and cool! I hope you stop back often to share when thoughts warrant a comment. Have a Merry Christmas!

    1. I've been checking in on you once in awhile and reading back posts of yours for a bit so for sure I'll be back! :)

      Nice to learn we have something in common!

  3. Greetings

    I think you summed it all up beautifully. Submitting to and serving my wife has added a clear purpose to my life and brought me unexpected levels of joy. Those who resist submitting must wonder how becoming to all intents and purposes a slave can possibly bring peace and joy, but it does. For me, like I guess you, serving provides the best way of expressing my deep (and deepening) love.

    There's another bonus which comes from there being clear leadership in our relationship. Most couples these days strive for equality, for decisions to be reached by consensus. That can be hard to achieve, and sometimes the lack of a decision means things don't get done and/or tensions arise. Though we will talk over big decisions the final say is hers. And thus (my) prevarication has been eliminated and more gets done. Also she is a saver, I've always been a spender. Not any more though, I now only get a small cash allowance; again surprisingly this brings me peace of mind.

    We started this journey towards mid-way through this year; that decision has transformed my life. I have every expectation that come next Christmas she will have me better trained and even more obedient - and bring it on. I've found your blog really helpful and so thank you.

    Joyful New Year to You and Katie


    1. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you and your wife Tony. I have appreciated your comments, insights and thoughts. I hope next year will be another year of the same. Blessings to you both

  4. I think this post is a great way to sum up what a wonderful life you and Katie have. I hope you have a blessed Christmas and New Year as well. R R ..

    1. RR, I would echo the comment I made above with you as well. I do wish you and your wife a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. I feel in some respects the blog as become the place where the old timers hang out and share. I know that is not true and know people of all ages stop by. I only wish they would be a part of it the way you have and the others that share often. Thanks for the complimentary words friend

  5. A purpose is necessary. Why would someone reapportion most all of themselves in such a fashion?
    It is always interesting to read the occasional troll comment on some blogs of how “you guys just don’t get it! Be a man, claim your birth right.” I know what I believe, but how would I explain it to them?
    The two of us have been in this long enough to have entered into the next phase of what I have read about on a few other blogs. The initial push and disclosure is past and life has settled into a new kind of normalcy. Not exactly where I thought it would go, but I don’t want to go back, either. I have learned so much since then about how I didn’t know anything about how a woman might think. I do try to watch and listen and tune myself into her day. At the risk of being too wordy for a reply post, this was last night.
    Our work schedules rarely mesh, so I was very eager to see her at 8:30 pm, the first time since morning. When she arrived, I had things prepared for her, so I waited as she busily readied herself with all the little things she wanted to complete from the current day and get ready for the next day. Needless to say, the meal was past peak before we finally ate had the opportunity to sit down at the couch to finally discuss the day. Two or three sentences into that and her phone rings. It's her mother on the east coast, ready for a long catch up. My back has been killing me for a week since pulling the snowblower cord the wrong way, so after about 20 minutes of listening to them talk, I thought to myself, enough of this, smiled at her, and selfishly headed up to bed. When do I get my time? (bad thought)
    Laying there by myself gave me more than enough time to reflect on what I overheard her tell her mother about all the things I had finished for her, were going to do next, and what we had done together recently. This conversation would never have occurred last year. These are things I guess I didn't hear while I was sitting there next to her.
    All those thoughts subsided as sleep came over me until some time later when I felt her slip into bed and spoon behind me, patting me on the side as her arm slipped around me. This time I thought it best to savor the moment as I succeeded in trying to breathe evenly so as not to give away my awareness she was there.
    My purpose was rewarded in knowing that I may have pleased her.

    1. J, Thanks for sharing your story. And I don't think that being long winded is a bad thing. Rather it's good to read of how much your wife appreciates all you have done for her - and even more significant is how proud she is of you - enough so that she wanted to share it with her mom. That's pretty special. Thanks again

  6. It has been mentioned regularly that male chastity combined with the wearing of female underwear by the male partner, is a more or less normal prelude to the gradual introduction of cuckolding in the relationship.
    Have you ever discussed together whether cuckolding might be a possible element in your relationship. Has one of you, or maybe both of you, a positive assessment regarding cuckolding.


    1. Maria,
      I am kept in chastity (mostly), and I do wear panties, whenever I am locked. But not always - for example we are traveling for the holidays and I am not locked for the duration of our trip to see family - and thus not wearing panties.

      Katie and I have talked about cuckholding. We love one another. We have thought long and hard about this topic and concluded that the only possible outcome of bringing another into our marriage is the dissolution of the intimacy we currently cherish so much.

      Katie's approach to keeping me as hers is not for play but rather for maintaining intimacy, closeness, and maintaining my submission. She personally has no desire in making love with another man. It does not interest her in the least.

      My guess is that you have such an interest or you would not have been asking. We have another factor involved in our decision that may not be in yours. We have core values that include following the bible. I wrote a post on cuckholding and found the old post. You can read it below if you wish. Love to follow up with further comments if you care to respond publicly on the blog or privately via email (imhersblog@yahoo). Thanks for the question.
      Merry Christmas!