Wednesday, April 30, 2014

Not Just Any Old Hug



Last night I climbed under the sheets. Katie climbed in next to me. The room was dark except for the TV light and Katie hit the remote after a few minutes shutting off some show that neither of us were watching.

“Roll over,” she said pushing on my right shoulder indicating her wish.

I did as I was told. Often she will push on that shoulder, sometimes the push is accompanied by a verbal command to ‘roll over’ but often it’s just a nudge with enough force to let me know she wants me to turn away so she can spoon against my back. Inevitably she thrusts one arm under the pillow my head is on and wraps the other around my torso. Usually a leg is draped over one or both of mine as she cuddles in close and gets comfortable.  That’s the usual routine and every time she does it, I love it.  I feel like she is taking me as her very own, which she kind of is in some respects.  In reality, her right hip is probably getting sore and she just wants to change positions and get more comfortable. Regardless of the reason, the command, the push and the subsequent feel of her arms and body against and around mine is always welcome. She feels great right there.

We don’t sleep like most couples. Most want space. Most want to not feel the presence of their partner when it is time to drift off into la-la land. Katie and I have never been that way. We sleep best spooning and Katie especially sleeps best when either I am tight against her back with my body wrapped around her or vice versa. I love sleeping like this. I feel secure. Her body feels small and petite, her skin so smooth; her muscles strong and lean, her breasts full and soft, her smell intoxicating. I love knowing my closeness allows her to relax completely and rest peacefully.  Likewise I love to feel her holding me. I feel her power. I feel her ownership and I love that she can be so free to tell me to ‘roll over’ or 'hold me' because that is what she wants at the time.

Well, last night as I was lying on my back she pushed on my shoulder after she shut the TV off and spoke those familiar words:  “Roll over; I want to snuggle behind you.”

But this time, after getting her one arm under my pillow, she pulled me tight against her with a strong forceful hug, and then pulled again - aggressively and rapidly several more times in succession - forcing her body tighter and tighter against mine.

‘Mmmm,” she whispered as she pulled. “I love you.”

I felt her kiss my back several times while she held her embrace.

I sighed, melting in the bliss of knowing that this hug was one in which she expressed real ownership of me. I felt truly owned in that moment and it felt so good. I belonged to her, not just in word but in body, mind and soul and I told her so.

“You know,” I said, “I love it when you take me like that. I feel like I am all yours.”

“Mm-mm,” she said. “You are.” She kissed me again.

“I am so happy right now. I love who I am and love who we are and how we live.”

“So do I,” she answered.

Changing the subject I shared how nice it was to read the comments of JT, Wishful 4, RR and others on a recent post. I told her how nice it is to hear their stories and know that there are other submissive guys out there like me who have found such happiness in submitting and giving themselves fully to the woman to whom they are married. I told her how cool it is to realize that they too have found the kind of love we’ve found living as a Domme/sub couple. Katie listened and held me close all the while.

“You know,” I said, “all your girlfriends know that you are the head of our home. Even though you haven’t told them outright, they know you are the one in charge and that there is something different about how we live. They know I follow you and let you make all the decisions.”

“I know they do,” she said quietly and quite matter-of-factly.

“And your kids know that too,” I added.

“I know,” she said.

“I like that they do.”

Katie was quiet. She kissed me again and gave me another squeeze.

“I love you,” she said.

“I love you too.”
…………………………………….

Today I thought about that hug and our short conversation often; that firm, strong repetitive hug from Katie; those short answers that conveyed her recognition that others knew she was the Mistress of our home. Each time I thought of last night I smiled. I smiled because I am hers. She really does own me. I really do belong to my wife and live with the knowledge that I vowed to serve her forever. I can not imagine feeling more content, more loved, more secure and more complete as a man knowing who I am and in whose care I have placed my trust. I have never known such love and I know that in addition to the love language of touch an even more powerful one. It is the love language of feeling dominated, feeling owned, and knowing that Katie is the one who is MY dominant and MY owner and I her sub. 

As paradoxical as that sounds it is so true. I need to feel her power. I need to feel her control. I need to feel dominated and have her treat me not just as her husband but as her submissive. I want her to make me serve, make me conform to her will, make me obey.  I need to know that I am owned by the way she treats me and interacts with me. This need not be a constant but it needs to be every now and then.  I need a dominant hug, a frown of disapproval, a command to do something immediately, a point to the floor telling me to pick that up while she watches or a hug that conveys I belong to her. Those moments speak volumes in my world.  Feeling her control draws me to her in ways nothing else can. It is a penetrating powerful love language.

I texted her tonight telling her I hoped she’d express that  power as a way of making me feel loved when I got home from work. I hope she does. I hope she understands just how much the expression of her dominance is also an expression of her love. For me, the two are one. 
 
Who would have thought there is a sixth love language after all.

I’m Hers

14 comments:

  1. One of my favorites is when Mistress lays on my chest and drifts off to sleep. It makes me feel so close to her.

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    1. There sure is something nice about having a woman take charge physically as well as mentally. Glad your Mistress does the same to you. We are lucky men because they feel so free to express themselves without reserve. Thanks for sharing your story.

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  2. I'm Hers - Owner often spoons me in exactly the way you describe too. Sometimes She will position Her thigh between mine and then slowly grind Herself against my buttocks. Owner is clear that my body is for Her pleasure, as i imagine Katie is with you and so i will frequently find myself lying there as She masturbates Herself against me, using my body as Her toy. i Love listening to Her in moments like that and the knowledge that my body is bringing Her pleasure is wonderful.

    We never have sex in the conventional sense but She uses me for sex a lot or fucks me with Her strapon if She wishes. She has always been clear though that only She can initiate any sexual activity but that, when She does, my role is to be available for Her. Thus, when She pushes me over and wraps Her body around mine it is always with the delightful thrill on my part of not knowing what, if anything may happen next. She may just hug, She may wish to rub, She may wish to penetrate - whatever it is entirely and only Her call. The anticipation is thrilling!

    p
    x

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    1. Happy pet,
      Thanks for sharing about you and Owner. I always enjoy small peeks into others' lives and that was part of the reason I wrote this post - so others could see into ours as well.

      Isn't it interesting how the 'not knowing what's going to happen' is so powerful. The fact that she can do with you whatever she wishes and you have to wait and be the recipient of whatever her will and whim is at the time is indeed thrilling. I think the fact that we live 'not knowing' exactly what they want or exactly if we've pleased them to satisfaction is part of the 'spice' that makes living the submissive life to a dominant woman so rewarding and fun. Thanks again!

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  3. IH,

    What a powerful and intimate moment for you and Katie. I'm glad that she is comfortable and happy in her role. May you two have many more nights like that.

    Scott

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    1. Thanks for the encouraging words. I hope we have many more as well. She is indeed the love of my life.

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  4. Relinquishing power and submitting yourself to someone certainly does not diminish the power of ones feelings. Your piece covered well the range and depth of feelings you experience in the life you share with her. I think I will go now and read it one more time. Thank you for the insight.

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    1. JT, you said something in a past comment not so long ago that has stuck with me. It was a passing thought about surrendering. It is what I want to do. I mean I have to a degree but not fully. I want to fully surrender and as Kathy (femdom101) said not too long ago that she expects her husband to 'unquestioningly obey' her. That is were I hope to be at some point in time. Should I get there I think the freedom will be quite profound.

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  5. I just want to pipe up and say you are a hopeless romantic.
    Truly I hope your children were raised the same way. More men like you and the men that replied are needed in this world. I know I am raising mine to be that way.
    Some are a bit more observant than others however..... lol
    It is so good to show your loving side. It isn't a weaker side, as I almost put that, but that is not the correct word. If you were weak you would have never wanted, needed or allowed your Katie to be in control.
    Thank you for sharing this with us. It really made my morning.
    I wish I could snuggle like that to sleep, but any pressure on my legs causes me to get restless. But I do snuggle as soon as I stir.
    :-)
    ~WillowFae

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    1. Willow Fae,
      You made my day with that comment! I never considered myself a hopeless romantic but maybe I am becoming more of one as I get older. I find that there is such security in snuggling and if I happen, or she happens, to snuggle an entire night together I wake feeling especially close to her even though the majority of that time is spent in an unconscious state. There must be a degree of consciousness there tho for the morning response/feeling to be as it is. I love it. Love her even more. Thanks for sharing!

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  6. You have been nominated for a Liebster Award (by me). Please go to my blog and see my latest entry: http://subhubphx.blogspot.com/ and there you will find all the information you need. I hope it is alright with you that I nominated you. I think you are fantastic. I thoroughly enjoy following your blog.

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    1. Subhub, what in the world is a Liebster award? I will have to do some research on it and see what I learn. Thanks for thinking of me in any event and thanks for the encouraging words. I am a simple guy that only wants others to know how beautiful submission to a woman is and can be for others. I know you know exactly how I feel and what it is I am talking about. We indeed are lucky men.

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  7. You have such a great gift to be able to express yourself with your posts.I also tell my wife about your blog as we have a lot in common with a FLR . Great post as always. RR

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    1. How true that thought of yours is. It seems that when we are preached to or have something rammed down our throats we often forget but the right word or action at the right time will stick with us for ever. I wish I knew why that was. Thanks for sharing and stop by again RR!

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