After getting over that unsettling information she told us about a time when her sister was younger and her husband gave her a weekly allowance. She couldn't believe that her sister had to live this way. Mom mentioned ways her sister got around the allowance limitations by borrowing money from others when she needed or wanted to purchased items that exceeded her imposed budget limits.
Later that afternoon mom, my daughter and I were talking again. I told her how different my marriage with Katie is when compared to my previous one. Her curiosity was piqued and she asked me to explain. I talked about how I attempted to keep our home together by controlling everything and everyone and I could see my daughter nodding in agreement. I mentioned how I gave up control when I married Katie and now let her be in charge of us.
I talked. Mom listened. Then I mentioned, "Katie gives me an allowance."
Mom responded, Telling me Katie was simply running the finances and budgeting money to me just as she would budget funds to other areas of our life. I agreed but made the comment that I check in with Katie before making purchases that will exceed my allowance.
I wanted her to draw the parallel between my situation and her sisters. However, I don't think mom equated my having an allowance in the same way as her sister having an allowance years ago. I don't think she heard me with the same part of her brain that has already pegged her sister's husband as being controlling. She views Katie's running of our finances as nothing more than her responsibly managing our home.
But she does know now that my earnings are deposited directly into katie's checking account, that Katie takes care of our finances, that I have an allowance, and I ask permission before spending anything that would exceed my limited funds. This of course was old news for my daughter who sat listening. Mail my mother has new information to chew on at some later point in time.
Like Katie my mother runs the budget in my parents home. My dad admits that if she were to die first he would be bankrupt within a month since he has no idea how she controls their budget or where the money goes on a weekly/monthly basis. My mother adamantly agrees!
I have found the last month interesting with respect to the conversations I've had with my children and my parents. We've touched on topics in which I can't help but convey the femdom perspective of our relationship. There is nothing wrong with how Katie and I live. Because I see us living so beautifully as a team I have no trouble sharing my lifestyle with those closest to me. They can agree or disagree and with our lifestyle but regardless of what they do with the information they cannot deny that Katie and I are in love and enjoy one another immensely. My parents see how happy we both are. My children see the same thing. My children can also see the difference in their dad and how happy he is now. They are intelligent young adults. Although they may not be ready to change things in their own home they definitely have something to think about with respect to how their dad lives with his new wife.