Monday, June 8, 2015

It's easier when we work together

Life with Katie has been going super good lately. Much of that may be due to the two of us spending more time together. I think both of us would agree that we feel very much in love and very close to emotionally, physically, and spiritually. For the past few weeks Katie has been quite comfortable telling me what she wants, speaking her mind and letting me know what she wants regardless of how it will make me feel, and supervising me and the goings on in our home according to her wishes.

Yesterday I went to use the bathroom. As I looked at the toilet I had a choice: stand or sit? I know what Katie wants me to do but when the door is shut, it's still a choice.  The choice today was so easy I gave it almost no thought. I gladly sat. I sat because I wanted to obey; I wanted her to be pleased with my choice - even if she would never now. As I sat I thought how easy it is to live as her submissive when she does her part by actively being my dominant. Maybe I've never thought of this before but the two roles really do go hand-in-hand. 

A few months ago I wrote a series of posts, one of which I believe I titled "I'm just not feeling it".  In that post I expressed the discontent I felt because Katie was not taking ownership of me the way I thought she should (and promised, when we exchanged our marriage vows). Just last week I remember reading a comment Cathy made. She said a femdom marriage takes upkeep; that it's not like a car that you can start and just let run on its own. Rhiannon made similar comments in her latest post where she emphasized the need to being consistent. For a WLM to work it needs active input from both parties. How true are the words from both of these women. I need to serve, to do the chores she has seemed mine. I need to wait on her and be there, anticipating her needs and desires constantly, but she needs to take charge, lead, and be the alpha female for this marriage to remain healthy.

My hope is that during the summer months I will continue to be actively submissive and she overtly dominant as we love one another. I know we have moved quite a way from the traditional 50/50 relationship we first envisioned when we first fell in love.  Way back then all we wanted was a normal healthy relationship - the kind our parents have. So much as happened since then. Now we still want to have a happy and healthy relationship but one in which Katie leads and I follow, where Katie controls and I obey and one where we communicate so intimately that we both never want to return to that 'old' way.  I do want to live as her knight and she as my Queen and like any medieval relationship, both the queen and knight have responsibilities.  I hope can remain similarly active and attentive to our respectful roles and duties.

I'm Hers

7 comments:

  1. That is so sweet, baby. We all need time to be together. Hope this summer will be a time for your love to grow. Kathy

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    1. Thank you! I sure hope the summer is a time for us to grow even closer. We plan on being busy and spending as much time as work will permit - together! Same wishes for you and your John.

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  2. I'm glad that you and Katie are spending lots of time together. It seems you have gotten through that spell when you were feeling down due to lack of overt dominance by Katie.

    Was it mostly Katiie becoming more comfortable in command? Or was it you coming to terms with the way it is, or was it something else? Is Misstress Katie recognizing that it's important for her to be the Queen in order for the relationship to soar?

    Happy summertime, my friend!

    Scott

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    1. I think it was a combination of her taking a bit more control and me coming to grips with her not wanting to discipline. I have too much good to enjoy to focus all my energy and thoughts on what I'm perceiving as one negative. Whether she recognizes her need to be truly dominant..... I think that will always be a challenge to some degree.
      But I did get that mower started today :)

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    2. Thank you for replying, I'm-Hers. I'm glad you are focusing on the wonderful things you do have with Katie and not on what you are NOT getting.

      Same here. Donna is quite comfortable being the Queen and having high expectations of me. She has no interest in disciplining me or engaging in much dominant play in the bedroom. Donna did playfully smack me in the nuts a couple times with a clothes hanger this morning, so that was fun, sort of.

      Take care,

      Scott

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  3. I'm really happy for the both of you.It's going on 4 years for my wife and I with our FLR and I can see her taking more control of our marriage. Just last week my daughter needed some money to make a big purchase and went to my wife to help with a loan. She's a great kid and is good with her money. She asked my wife if she could help out some and see what dad thought about it. My wife told her I don't need to ask your dad I handle the money in our house and he will be fine with whatever I decide. After twenty years of marriage she has made very good choices and has put us in great shape for retirement. But I thought it was great that she could share this with our daughter .I'm proud of our FLR and I love seeing my wife being more comfortable about taking control and leading our marriage. Hope you are enjoying your summer take care.RR

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    1. RR,
      Don't you love it when they just be themselves and take charge? I love those times as well. They verify the relational dynamic that is present and serve as memories that will remind each of that fact. Thanks for sharing your story! Enjoy you summer.

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