Tuesday, September 29, 2015

Running to Chastity

I smiled last week when Mr Ellie from the Serving Ellie blog wrote about his wife agreeing to place him in chastity. What humored me was not so much that she agreed to do something she was initially hesitant to do but how this decision came about. If you read his first post Mr. Ellie basically said, “Mrs. Ellie, I'm having trouble controlling my masturbation and I think the best way to curb this is to put me into a cage.”  In the final paragraph of that post Mr. Ellie let’s his readers know he is leaning toward one particular device but wanted to hear others’ thoughts BUT within 48 hours he made had made his decision and I'm sure the cage was in the mail hours later and is now securely anchored to his body.

I smiled when I read what he had to say. Actually I read the “The decision is made” one before I viewed the “Ellie, we have a problem” one. For those of you who wear such a device, can you identify with his feelings and emotions? I can. Mr. Ellie asked for opinions on sizing during that initial post. He didn’t want to get it wrong. He wanted to size the ring properly. One commenter suggested he order sizing rings from another company. That was a great idea - a fail-safe way, in fact, to make sure he didn't waste his hard earned money. But if he chose to do that he'd have to wait another 7-10 days for those little rings to arrive. To Mr. Ellie, at that moment - that moment when she FINALLY said 'yes' - that option must have felt like an eternity and I bet Mr. Ellie considered that commenter's option for less than 3 seconds - even though he’s lived a life in penis-freedom for literally thousands of days. To wait another week? Are you kidding me? There was no way his 'chastity-laden mind' was going to delay a day longer than necessary. No way Jose! He probably said, ‘Heck (he's a Christian guy remember and doesn't curse) with the sizing. Heck with the $50. Just get me the device and lock me up, Mrs. Ellie!” 

Now, I know those exact words probably never came out of his mouth but I could sense his urgency. I could sense him wanting to seize the moment of his wife’s “weakness” – her f-i-n-a-l-l-y  saying ‘yes’ to chastity. After all this was his submissive-dream come true - to finally be locked up nice and tight!

I read some weeks/months ago on Katie Christian’s My Chaste Husband’s blog of her husband coming to her expressing the same concerns for the same reasons. Her reaction was much different. I believe she called him a pervert – or at least thought as much. I’m sure those words or her negative reception of his desire to be put into a device felt like a knife blow to the center of his heart.

In both instances I believe both men talked to their wives with a sense of desperation. I’ve heard psychologists refer to these overt suggestions as a ‘cry for help’.  I’m sure we all have those moments when we feel as if we simply cannot beat the villain in our life and finally come to someone near and dear and say in so many words, “please help me by doing this or that or help me to not do this or that.” 

For Mr. Katie Christian and for Mr. Ellie, I’m glad both of their wives saw the potential positives in that cry for help. For Mr. Katie Christian, he’s been locked long enough for Mrs. Katie Christian to see the benefit locking him for an extended period has. For Mrs. Ellie, I hope she finds the same to be true and isn't afraid to put the key away for a few months to really watch the change in her husband take place before her eyes.

But for Mr Katie Christian and Mr Ellie I’m almost certain their adrenaline levels remained in a continual state of hyper drive during the ‘waiting for the appliance to arrive’-interlude, as well as during those few days after the lock was clicked shut. I know I can remember waiting for the plain brown box to arrive in the mail. I can remember fitting it that first time and then clicking the lock. I can remember feeling awkward showing my 'little me' to Katie those first few times. I can remember her worrying about me remaining clean since I was now stuck inside a plastic tube. I can remember her worrying if the device was too tight and might cause permanent damage to my goods. I can remember the general excitement of everything surrounding this new beginning of my life/our lives together.

What I’ve noticed in my blog has been the slow transition of posts that resemble less and less those adrenaline assisted writings. I’ve been wondering if the posts have become more blasé, and maybe they have. If so, it’s because my submissive life can only have so many new things happen until there is no more new stuff to write about.  Chastity is just that now – I’m locked. Denial is no longer the “I’ve been denied for 9 days 15 hours and 11 minutes” rush.  Rather it’s more like, I’ve not floored the gas pedal in six or seven months and I wonder if I ever fully rev the engine again. I don’t feel titillated when Katie asks me to cook her dinner or vacuum the floor. I’ve got chores to do so I do them.

But for Mr. Ellie…. I’m happy for him. I hope he guessed the right size. I hope he feels ecstatic being locked. I hope it reinforces his submission to his wife. I hope he comes to love those 5 AM wake up calls when Rocky wants to stretch but no longer has room to do so and pulls his balls painfully tight. I hope he and his Mistress can laugh and joke about how long she wants to lock him just because she has the power to do so now. I hope he thinks about her brief squeeze in the morning when she checks her goods. I hope he thinks about how hot she was for grabbing him there 10 hours previous. I’m happy for him because I remember just how happy I was when all those things happened to me. Merry Christmas Mr. Ellie! And in the end, I do hope it curbs the very thing you’ve wanted to stop.

I’m Hers


  1. Hi IH, I also felt the same way when I read "Serving Ellie's" post about trying male chastity. I wish them the best because it has such a great potential to make a relationship better. Think I have read this a hundred times where, "If all women knew what male chastity could do for their relationship, there would be many more husbands/SOs under lock and key". Guess most women do it initially because they think it is something we want and they do want to please us. It takes quite a while for some of them to see the light such as the "Mrs Katie" of which you speak. I look forward to reading about Mrs Ellie's journey of discovery. Take care!

    1. I'm pretty certain Mrs Ellie will enjoy this. She seems like a great woman and the two obviously have a stable relationship to boot. I'm glad she decided to give chastity a try.
      Thanks for stopping bye and hope you are well.

  2. Hey Bud,

    Hope your transition into fall is going swimmingly and this finds your Mistress Wife and you doing well.

    Whenever the topic of chastity comes up, it is often a foregone conclusion that the term (chastity) automatically refers to the use of a chastity device. Mine is a CB6000 and for the most, it sits in it's custom pouch, in the back reaches of my underwear/panty drawer. It comes out occasionally for truly symbolic reasons or for punishment only. Sometimes, Mistress K. just simply likes the way of looks and wants to see me in it for a while. Other times, I am being punished and the penance is wearing my cage.

    Chastity means abstinence. The use of a device to achieve that abstinence is something in ADDITION to chastity. Please don't misunderstand. I don't have a problem with the required or voluntary use of a device. None whatsoever .... I know that I am fortunate to be able to remain chaste without the required use of a cock cage. Maybe I was lucky. Maybe it was those early, awkward days of our FLM where the very first thing I bought was a cock cage. It seemed so natural to me then too. I mean, every submissive male was required to wear one right. It was a law, right?

    In the beginning, I wore it for days on end and went all of the physical and emotional Phases while wearing. I was excited because it was, you know cool. I would look at myself in the mirror and see the very image that defined Female Led Marriage. I was wearing a device that actually locked access to my cock and prevented me from getting an erection. I stood there, wondering how I got there. It absolutely helped me confirm and reconfirm in my mind that I was where I wanted to be. Those early days, where I would have the cage on for 4-5days at a time, 1 day off, then 4-5 days more where a burden. A burden that I knew if I could endure, I was in the right role as my wife's submissive.

    In the end, Mistress K. felt she could trust me enough to NEVER violate my sacred vow to not orgasm, not masturbate and not touch myself sexually without her consent and without her direct supervision. She trusts me implicitly with something so vitally important. If I were to break my vow of chastity and abstinence, it would be akin to cheating on her by having sex with another person. Physical sexual pleasure for me is owned by my beautiful wife and only she can decide if and when I am allowed to have it. Of course my orgasms are owned by Mistress. Surely, if I were to do something as foolish and selfish as to steal one or more from her, then Mistress knows that she could not trust me to be devoted to her in the way I vowed to be when she collared me.

    All this being said, there are times when I just miss wearing my old buddy. Not surprisingly, sex while wearing the cage is among the best sex I have ever experienced!

    OK, I'll stop babbling now ............... Great Post my friend!

    1. Good thoughts SHIP! Sorry for not responding to your comment sooner. You are among the few that can go without touching yourself while free. I don't thing most men can. I know I'm not in that select group and Katie doesn't seem concerned that I touch - as long as it's minimal. No real emotional arousal permitted. If so, her hand sweeps in and pulls mine to some other locale - away from the little soldier, as Kathy often calls it LOL.

      I think the idea of being locked is different for every couple. You two found what works best for you, while others find different solutions. I've said multiple times, I'm a free man at night and locked during the day. It's what she wants and so I follow her directive.

      I do hope Mr Ellie finds his path with his Misses. In the end, the device should serve as a means of drawing two people closer. It really isn't about the device at all in that regard but about relationship.

      Thanks for sharing!

  3. i've thought about telling my Wife similarly, that it would be better that i'm locked -- so i would be more attentive, and FAR more productive when She is out. But yes, it's something i'm afraid of as well. Very interesting post, thanks sara e

    1. It's always best to approach your marriage with an open heart (including expressing your deeper thoughts, regardless of the internal fear.). I hope you have the courage to do so.

  4. You don't have a first name?
    We just call you "Im-hers"?

    One more question. I've been a Christian for 59 years and you stated, I believe, that you are a Christian as well. Would it interest you that there are scriptures that -- when properly translated -- clearly teach that wives have domestic authority over their husbands and are to "rule" the home? Believe it or not, there are at least 3 scriptures that even strongly suggest that wives are to discipline their husbands as well.

    Enjoyed your article, "The Flip Side."

    -- Ken

    1. brixken7,
      Thanks for taking the time to write. If I"m not mistaken you did post several verses at a previous time. I did check them out too. Thanks for stopping by to comment! Wish you two the best.